Late

View PDF

I mourn my father. 
I am afraid to relive him 
lest my heart break. 

He had circled outside my perimeter,
did not intrude, but hovered 
undetected. I rejected. 

To the end of his days 
I was no partaker of his feast. 
I had no taste. 

He ate in barrenness, at the last 
in cold hospital nights, calling 
my name. I did not wait. 

Once I hugged his sedated body 
bridled to tubes, bitten with sores. 
Said Goodnight, turned. 

Surprisingly, he answered, 
a gruff solid sound, 
a deep last greeting. 

Had he always heard me, waited 
my lifetime to answer to words 
I did not speak, 

always ready to say Goodnight? 
Tears tremble, tears I dare not loosen.
I will drown.